Rebuttal

This here's Jake.  I'd like to tell you all what the truth is about life at our place!

As a matter of fact, things were just fine around here before the spawn of the d.. puppy came to stay.  I had all the toys I wanted and the household ran just right.

When company came to visit, I made them feel right at home.  I could sure make everyone laugh!  Now they all pay attention to Barney.  They act like they think he's cute, but I know better!

I am perfectly capable of inspecting Mom's quilt work, thank you very much!  She is getting pretty good at it, too, so there isn't much that needs to be tested.

I tried to be helpful when Barney was a little guy.  He wasn't very good at jumping up and down, so I gave him lots of advice and encouragement.

I still have to do a lot of babysitting, though.  After all this time!  When is this puppy going to grow up already?

He needs watching all the time, both indoors and outside.  The silly puppy even chases birds!  Every puggy knows that birds are our friends.

And we even have to share toys now!  Well, I admit that it's fun to play tug-o-war and chase-through-the-house sometimes.  But a pug my age has to maintain a little dignity!

In my opinion, all those pictures of Barney "working" are really pictures of Barney being a pest!  I am the perfect example of proper pug behavior.  Quiet supervision is all my people need, because I've trained them well.